Why I don't care about your selfies

I know, you put some make up on or do your hair all nice and handsome like and it’s time to share one of your 78 selfies in your photo album from today. Cash in on few likes to get reaffirmation that you are looking chipper and don’t forget to double check to see if any three of your crushes liked it.

Or maybe it’s been twelve weeks since you started your powder diet and it’s time to not push the stomach out or hunch the shoulders in bad lighting but rather get that rad drop light over the ripples of starvation to show some sweet abs whilst cracking a smile faker than Kim Kardashian.

I would say I get it. But I don’t.

Selfies more often than not simply lie. I am going to save you all from going down the road of using the narcissistic word and focus more on the truth of what social media isn’t telling you.

Selfies don’t mean shit. Everyone takes a selfie from time to time. Cool – whatever. But they don’t tell you the truth. Most fitness companies want you to take before and afters for marketing reasons. That’s right, they want to set the stage in a way so you get MASSIVE results in a short period of time so they can book out their next 12 week challenge. Which is a great opportunity to really fuck up the already confused and likely abusive relationship you have with food and your body.

Harsh – but true.

Look, I am not saying never take a good ol selfie. I am simply saying don’t believe everyone that takes them has this magical life free of periods or bad hair days that forces you (the poor sod getting arthritis in your thumb from scrolling through your newsfeed) to think that you are not worthy of such douchebagism.

I respect the hard work that goes into a physical transformation. I don’t respect self proclaimed “coaches” in the fitness industry prying on insecurities to create a name for themselves and market “results”. The damn fucking truth is that these people usually crash back to their default relationship that they had with food and themselves weeks after the “after” photo.

After what?

After you have fed their insecurities about how they aren’t good enough and if they spend 12 weeks with old mate Guru ‘Dietron’ and Coach ‘Max Out’ you will forever and ever be happy.

Bullshit.

I have had too many conversations with people over the last decade to know that as great as “transformations” are, nothing will trump the experiences you create with your life. I have also learnt that pretty much nothing in this industry is bad. Powerlifting isn’t bad, body building isn’t bad, diets aren’t bad, CrossFit isn’t bad. The only thing that can be bad is your relationship with any of those things. Some bodybuilders lead a healthy long life whilst others are hiding an eating disorder in the first comp before they stack a heap of weight back on post comp and go back to hating themselves BECAUSE NO ONE EVER HELPED CHANGE THEIR RELATIONSHIP IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Sorry…. Caps lock got stuck…. It was just a coincidence that it was on a focal point of this article.

Anyway…

The fact is most trainers out exercise their clients as it is. They flog them to achieve a level of fitness they will never ever use and then when either one is done with each other (you step on lego or you trainer gets offered better money in the public service) you revert back to where you were when you started. Whilst this whole time risking injury that they should never of had to risk. It's as if somehow magically our health has become someone else's responsibility? I am not saying don’t challenge yourself, I am saying this whole training, food and health thing is a lifelong relationship. Not an abusive 12 week relationship full of lies that dumps you on your arse not knowing whether or not you should eat white rice or brown rice or carbs after 2 or should I fart before I weigh myself or is it silly to drink water between pull up sets because it adds to my bodyweight or will that make me stronger, is water even paleo?

….am I even paleo?...

Stop.

Life is not about losing weight. Ever. Life is about participating in life. Weight loss should be a by-product of that. I much prefer to see photos of my friends hiking or playing with their kids or some sweet gopro selfie underwater. Yeah! Take those kind of selfies. They are proof that you are actually participating in life. They also encourage others to get off their arse and do the same thing.

If I had to share photos of the best transformations of people I have spoken with, trained with, coached or stories I have heard then most of the time the photo wouldn’t tell you shit.

Because the photo didn’t tell you that they didn’t jump (and no, I am not talking box jumps). They didn’t tell you that the training and community stopped their social anxiety. The photo didn’t tell you that they reduced or even got off meds for a number of different health issues. The photo doesn’t tell you about how a 35yr old accountant was teaching his 6yr old daughter to do handstands.

Photos rarely tell you the shit that matters.

Sure, knowing how physically far you have come is nice. I am not putting down a transformation. Just be upfront and clear with exactly what the transformation meant between the ears. Because that’s what matters the most.

In fact, truth be told is the only thing that matters with your fitness is how you actually used it.

Put simply; Eat food, move your arse and get outside.

p.s. If you want to measure your results then go for it. Just be sure to be honest about your relationship with yourself prior to starting. Also, remember that when you are laid up on the last bed you will sleep on, the chances of having a framed picture of you or your results next to the bed is quite low. Experience life.

p.p.s For the record - I am not putting down effort. I am putting down the core of the issue which is the idea that a photo has a direct correlation to being happy. It promotes it, it doesn't promise it.

Dave NixonComment